Amanda, Barbara, and [%from_name%] [[%from_email%]]: I’ve got all the OEM software I can use. Please save yourselves the obvious effort you’re putting into the mails you send me. Especially you, Ms./Mr. [[%from_email%%]]. Really, it breaks my heart to know how much your fingers must be aching from all that typing.
Mrs. Williams, I’m very happy you’ve received Christ, but I’m sorry that your husband Peter died in Kenya. I’m doubly sorry since you wrote me last month about your husband Phillip who had died in Nigeria. As much as I’d like to help you out with those two $20 million dollar bonanzas sitting in European banks, but I’m unable to help you. Good luck with that esophageal cancer you’re fighting, though.
Dear William, Alexander, Walter, and Rogert: Please stop sending me all those mails for Cialis and Viagra. I appreciate your thoughts, but really, I’m not in need of those particular pharmecuticals. (Robert, that Prozac e-mail you sent. We may need to talk.)
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